The day I felt myself up and got a suprise

The shower was hot and steamy and she stood letting the water wash over her. She was nervous as always. She had done it so many times that she should be used to it by now - the nervousness a thing of the past, but it wasn't. She remembers it wasn’t always like this – she didn’t used to be so tense. How could something so simple become so significant in her life?


Slowly her fingers crept upward towards her breasts. Her breath catching as they got closer, she steadied herself and moved on. With one arm raised she used her hand to circle and feel each inch, exploring herself in intimate detail. Moving bit by bit she covered every area of skin, cupping, circling, exploring. The water, giving her skin a silkiness that allows her hands to glide smoothly over the surface of her breast, has begun to slightly cool but so intent on her exploration she doesn’t notice. First one breast, then the other… When it is finally over she releases a trembling sigh of relief, turns off the now tepid water and steps out to face the world… until the next time…


I have done routine breast exams since I had my children, my doctor was insistent that I do... it has never been a big deal for me. Then three years ago during a routine examination, I felt something that wasn't supposed to be there. Some abnormality growing inside of me. I quickly scheduled an appointment with my doctor - who upon feeling it, insisted I have a mammogram that day - there was indeed something there. For two weeks I underwent tests and exploratory surgery to discover was simply a harmless cyst. I was lucky but on a personal level something that was so routine has become something that I slightly fear now.

Women take care of your bodies, check them, know them, cherish them. Men encourage the women you love to take care of themselves, to do self-examinations, to have mammograms. Your lovers, your mothers, your sisters, your daughters.

Write with you again soon!