The shower was hot and steamy and she stood letting the water wash over her. She was nervous as always. She had done it so many times that she should be used to it by now - the nervousness a thing of the past, but it wasn't. She remembers it wasn’t always like this – she didn’t used to be so tense. How could something so simple become so significant in her life?
Slowly her fingers crept upward towards her breasts. Her breath catching as they got closer, she steadied herself and moved on. With one arm raised she used her hand to circle and feel each inch, exploring herself in intimate detail. Moving bit by bit she covered every area of skin, cupping, circling, exploring. The water, giving her skin a silkiness that allows her hands to glide smoothly over the surface of her breast, has begun to slightly cool but so intent on her exploration she doesn’t notice. First one breast, then the other… When it is finally over she releases a trembling sigh of relief, turns off the now tepid water and steps out to face the world… until the next time…
I have done routine breast exams since I had my children, my doctor was insistent that I do... it has never been a big deal for me. Then three years ago during a routine examination, I felt something that wasn't supposed to be there. Some abnormality growing inside of me. I quickly scheduled an appointment with my doctor - who upon feeling it, insisted I have a mammogram that day - there was indeed something there. For two weeks I underwent tests and exploratory surgery to discover was simply a harmless cyst. I was lucky but on a personal level something that was so routine has become something that I slightly fear now.
Women take care of your bodies, check them, know them, cherish them. Men encourage the women you love to take care of themselves, to do self-examinations, to have mammograms. Your lovers, your mothers, your sisters, your daughters.
Write with you again soon!
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Talking mice, Magic Pumpkins and The Fairy Godmother that forgot the instructions
The Scene: The young beautiful woman was at the kitchen counter humming softly along with the quiet romantic music playing in the background, sleeves rolled up, rolling pin in her hand and starlight in her eyes. She is on a mission, a task of love - she is preparing the first dinner for her and her wonderful husband in their new home. This city girl turned country was determined to make it work, so hand rolled biscuits were the final order of the day. Oven pre-heating, everything else already prepared and in the refrigerator waiting to be put into the oven.
The table is set with the pristine white linens, the new china, the sparkling glasses, the bowl of flowers and the candles just waiting to be lit for the very romantic evening. Everything was perfect...
When suddenly, from the corner of her eye she caught some movement and turned her head - and there before her was a horror of all horrors! With an ear piercing scream she scrambled away as quickly as she could to get away but there was no where to run and no one to hear her screams - trapped in the middle of nowhere, completely alone. But still she had to try, the sound of breaking glass thundered through the house mixed with the screams that were soon fading into heart wrenching whimpers. She wasn't strong enough to fight and the evil dark eyes had her frozen her in her fear.
A few hours later he returned home and found what was left of her The table was strewn with broken glass and wrinkled linens - with a band a serial field mice close by...
When I was a newlywed, we lived in a 110 year old antique salt box farm house - I was a city girl and having lived in some of the major cities in the U.S., I was excited at the prospect of country life. She stood in all her grand glory so beautiful in her surroundings that you didn't notice her flaws, until her lived in her and they began to show themselves in living color. My husband really did come home and find me hovered on the kitchen table since it was my first experience with the wild. After laughing at me for a while - he helped me down and then the next day we got cats - to drive out the mice... knowing then what I know now... I would've kept the mice because I hear they can talk and clean house - (Cinderella knew her stuff!)
The important thing is to learn to laugh at your self - Life comes at you fast if you take it to serious - you are going to end up tr aped on a kitchen table until help decides to show up...
Laugh like no one's watching, Dance because you can and Love like its your last day on earth!
Writing with you soon!
The table is set with the pristine white linens, the new china, the sparkling glasses, the bowl of flowers and the candles just waiting to be lit for the very romantic evening. Everything was perfect...
When suddenly, from the corner of her eye she caught some movement and turned her head - and there before her was a horror of all horrors! With an ear piercing scream she scrambled away as quickly as she could to get away but there was no where to run and no one to hear her screams - trapped in the middle of nowhere, completely alone. But still she had to try, the sound of breaking glass thundered through the house mixed with the screams that were soon fading into heart wrenching whimpers. She wasn't strong enough to fight and the evil dark eyes had her frozen her in her fear.
A few hours later he returned home and found what was left of her The table was strewn with broken glass and wrinkled linens - with a band a serial field mice close by...
When I was a newlywed, we lived in a 110 year old antique salt box farm house - I was a city girl and having lived in some of the major cities in the U.S., I was excited at the prospect of country life. She stood in all her grand glory so beautiful in her surroundings that you didn't notice her flaws, until her lived in her and they began to show themselves in living color. My husband really did come home and find me hovered on the kitchen table since it was my first experience with the wild. After laughing at me for a while - he helped me down and then the next day we got cats - to drive out the mice... knowing then what I know now... I would've kept the mice because I hear they can talk and clean house - (Cinderella knew her stuff!)
The important thing is to learn to laugh at your self - Life comes at you fast if you take it to serious - you are going to end up tr aped on a kitchen table until help decides to show up...
Laugh like no one's watching, Dance because you can and Love like its your last day on earth!
Writing with you soon!
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